Sensei and I spoke a few days ago and I promised to write this, but held off from the day of the demonstration until now. I will think a bit longer before putting forth an opinion as to why the wait was required but, now that Sensei has written, it seems appropriate to do so as well. I received the dojo card (thanks to the consistent care of Jeff Lee) and it felt lovely to read your congratulations and loving encouragement. Several questions are occupying part of my attention while I continue to write my dissertation.
How to participate in this as though martial disciplines are something I/we take seriously?
Do what I we've been practicing. When I'm not sure of the appropriate intervention I hope to wait in gentle motion to:
Where do I stand with: Sensei, myself, family, friends and acquaintances, clients, the dojo, the CAA and its Division One (Iwama stylists), Hombu Dojo (aka The Aikikai)?
Preparing and presenting the demo was a great pleasure. Beyond all the speculation about the value of working for rank and testing, I love to rehearse and perform and, like grabbing any excuse to throw a party, eagerly look forward to any chance to get special training around tests, demos and the like. Rank matters because we agree as a group to use a ranked system, it affects my income (higher rank = the expectation of charging more for professional work), it can be used well to create an ordered environment which aids training, and because, inevitably, when it is used poorly it gives crucial opportunities to make clear that true martial art forms are profoundly internal and intangible as well, especially in a world that includes interpersonal conflict on a daily basis but relatively little (in most upper-middle and upper class lives) regular physical confrontation.
As far as I'm concerned my promotion happened on May 31st. Sensei loudly encouraged me to repeat this to you in print.
My teacher, following the traditions of our art, the by-laws or our organization, and the proclamation of our Division Head on the day of the demonstration, recommended me for promotion and was publicly more than satisfied with what she saw on Wednesday at our dojo, on Saturday at Sunset Cliff's, and on reviewing the video of both. Good grief, what more could I want? The rest can circle the drain a few more times before dropping, if that will serve someone's purpose somewhere. When anyone asks, I say "Sensei promoted me in May, our division will probably recognize the promotion sometime in the next year, and then paperwork and money will probably wing their way Nipponwards sometime thereafter."
It might be interesting and revealing to conflict meaningfully with various brokers of power over this but, for now, I'm pretty freakin' tired of randori and, as long as it doesn't interfere with falling down in the dojo, why spend the energy in reaction that could be reserved for response? If this begins to leak out of its current container and directly impact (beyond sympathetic reaction) other folks than just Sensei and me, then I will have to re-evaluate and begin choosing targets. That would not be acceptable. It is part of our job descriptions as martial artists to make each other, our teachers, colleagues, students, and community a bit usefully uncomfortable and we and they are responsible for living up to that and what follows.
What needs doing?
Training! Paul Lord happened to be in Dallas last night, so he and Lisa and I headed for North Texas Aikido (Russ Alvey, Sensei) for some time on the mat. Lisa and I both began our Aikido paths there and, even though the dojo has relocated, it still feels like home. They don't zoom like Sensei does (and consequently we do) but their clarity and heart continue to shine ever more brightly. Nothing motivates like a good ole' Texas sankyo or nikyo. :) And the beer, stories, and humor while sitting around on the mat after class never fail to raise my cosmic gratitude level. I HIGHLY recommend that you bring a friend or five to the dojo and grow our practice. More bodies to toss means better understanding of variations in your body and more proverbial arrows for your martial quiver. The possibilities make me. Quiver, I mean.
Beyond that I think it would probably be wise to see how the Div 1 dojocho respond to Sensei's letter and then
Again, feeling gratitude for you and for everyone from around the country who has been so clear and forthcoming,
Brandon WilliamsCraig, yondan
|
How to participate in this as though martial disciplines are something I/we take seriously?
Do what I we've been practicing. When I'm not sure of the appropriate intervention I hope to wait in gentle motion to:
- get close enough to make a dynamic difference but also far enough off the line so as not to be swept away
- breath smoothly and become aware of as much as is possible
- trust what you have practiced, including the assumption that your capacity will be insufficient without the engagement of your full heart and most authentic intentions.
- either move completely or do not - waffling is for breakfast (and requires maple syrup). Life and death require all of you. When you are ready and your waiting is through the correct choice will be directly in front of your center where you may bring your power to bear with most effect.
Where do I stand with: Sensei, myself, family, friends and acquaintances, clients, the dojo, the CAA and its Division One (Iwama stylists), Hombu Dojo (aka The Aikikai)?
Preparing and presenting the demo was a great pleasure. Beyond all the speculation about the value of working for rank and testing, I love to rehearse and perform and, like grabbing any excuse to throw a party, eagerly look forward to any chance to get special training around tests, demos and the like. Rank matters because we agree as a group to use a ranked system, it affects my income (higher rank = the expectation of charging more for professional work), it can be used well to create an ordered environment which aids training, and because, inevitably, when it is used poorly it gives crucial opportunities to make clear that true martial art forms are profoundly internal and intangible as well, especially in a world that includes interpersonal conflict on a daily basis but relatively little (in most upper-middle and upper class lives) regular physical confrontation.
As far as I'm concerned my promotion happened on May 31st. Sensei loudly encouraged me to repeat this to you in print.
My teacher, following the traditions of our art, the by-laws or our organization, and the proclamation of our Division Head on the day of the demonstration, recommended me for promotion and was publicly more than satisfied with what she saw on Wednesday at our dojo, on Saturday at Sunset Cliff's, and on reviewing the video of both. Good grief, what more could I want? The rest can circle the drain a few more times before dropping, if that will serve someone's purpose somewhere. When anyone asks, I say "Sensei promoted me in May, our division will probably recognize the promotion sometime in the next year, and then paperwork and money will probably wing their way Nipponwards sometime thereafter."
It might be interesting and revealing to conflict meaningfully with various brokers of power over this but, for now, I'm pretty freakin' tired of randori and, as long as it doesn't interfere with falling down in the dojo, why spend the energy in reaction that could be reserved for response? If this begins to leak out of its current container and directly impact (beyond sympathetic reaction) other folks than just Sensei and me, then I will have to re-evaluate and begin choosing targets. That would not be acceptable. It is part of our job descriptions as martial artists to make each other, our teachers, colleagues, students, and community a bit usefully uncomfortable and we and they are responsible for living up to that and what follows.
What needs doing?
Training! Paul Lord happened to be in Dallas last night, so he and Lisa and I headed for North Texas Aikido (Russ Alvey, Sensei) for some time on the mat. Lisa and I both began our Aikido paths there and, even though the dojo has relocated, it still feels like home. They don't zoom like Sensei does (and consequently we do) but their clarity and heart continue to shine ever more brightly. Nothing motivates like a good ole' Texas sankyo or nikyo. :) And the beer, stories, and humor while sitting around on the mat after class never fail to raise my cosmic gratitude level. I HIGHLY recommend that you bring a friend or five to the dojo and grow our practice. More bodies to toss means better understanding of variations in your body and more proverbial arrows for your martial quiver. The possibilities make me. Quiver, I mean.
Beyond that I think it would probably be wise to see how the Div 1 dojocho respond to Sensei's letter and then
- should they ignore a colleague bringing a justice issue to their attention, perhaps the greater CAA organization will not be insensitive to the implications of such a power move.
- I'd be happy to submit my paperwork, fees, and essay as always follows a recommendation for promotion, for transmission to Japan, no matter what they decide.
- when they chose to support an outcome that is not hostile to Sensei's integrity and right to promote they should be appreciated (but probably not congratulated too loudly) for their capacity and willingness to work with the levels of Aikido that are most difficult to learn and even more to practice, no matter your published rank.
Again, feeling gratitude for you and for everyone from around the country who has been so clear and forthcoming,
Brandon WilliamsCraig, yondan
Labels: AiBerk, Aikido, CAA, conflict
| posted by Unknown @ 6/14/2007 05:15:00 PM
